Friday, November 19, 2010


I don’t want to give it up. Its comfortable. Its heartache. Its mistakes. Its lack of trust. Its abandonment. Its waiting for someone to change. It’s time I can’t get back. It’s a bad relationship. Its selfishness. Its failure.

All these things represent all that I hold onto. Why can’t I let them go? I stay in the molds which other people have plastered me in and I don’t believe I can be redeemed. I have tried too long to keep this life up on my own thinking that I can fix my soul. Why do I feel I need to handle everything on my own? This week I found relief; refreshing, weight lifting, life changing relief. Relief came when I realized that it’s just me and God. I have my own relationship with God and it doesn’t have to be “all prettied up” (as my pastor Dan Sutherland would say). He knows me, who I am now and He knows who I long to be.

I don’t need to say a fancy prayer, I can be real with God.

I messed up yesterday, I messed up today, he knows it and yet wants to take on life with me. We mess up but His love remains the same and freedom can be found through surrendering. We can be redeemed through surrendering our imperfections to God; he will show up when we give up control. I know that when I’m doing life my way I can’t hear Gods soft whisper to my heart; and I probably can’t hear it because I’m not asking for it either!

Surrender means to relinquish, hand over, part with, forfeit it’s the beauty of someone unwrapping their weary burdened arms, letting go of heartache, mistakes, abandonment, failure and laying it down at the foot of the cross for God to help.

Mathew 11:28-30 “Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke in heart and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and burden is light.”

1 comment:

  1. Wow! You nailed on the head what God has been doing in my heart. I'm slowly realizing that the things I'm struggling with are because I am refusing to give things up, because it's hard! It hurts!! Sacrifice is painful!! Thanks for this beautiful reminder. It's so hard to remember that we won't grow when we are trying to attain to all things holy on our own, it's when we realize that we can't do it, that the Lord can move in our hearts! Beautiful reminder!